accepting reality.

Have you ever been that person that someone comes to for advice, but when the advice is not what that person wants to hear, it just gets disregarded, yet somewhat appreciated? Well, I’ve been the person giving the advice and getting the advice.

The perspective of the advice giver:
As the person being asked for advice, you feel special. you feel a sense of wisdom, leadership, and trust from the person asking you for the advice. It boosts your confidence in a way that makes your life choices seem like other people think they have been made with sound judgement and discretion. On the other hand when the same person comes back to you repeatedly for the same advice you start to doubt your influence, your ability to change the things around you, and your skills to help others. It’s kind of a double-edged sword being the person giving the advice…

The perspective of the advice getter:
As the person asking for the advice you feel vulnerable. You feel helpless and in need of someone else to help dissect your brain. When asking for advice you always ask someone you know you can trust and someone who won’t judge you for your seemingly stupid actions. On the other hand to this perspective you already know before you ask for advice whether or not you are going to implement this newly given wisdom, or disregard it and continue in your same old ways. It’s a pre-determined thinking, because you are never going to change unless you, the advice getter, wants the situation to change.

It sucks being the person always asking for advice, but it sucks too when you can’t convince your heart to change when your brain wants to.

I feel like I go through a constant cycle of giving advice and getting advice with my friends. Most of the time it isn’t about the same situation thank God! At this point in my life now, I have been the one asking for advice lately and I have totally disregarded my friends sincere advice. So in this situation, I take a step back and look at my motivation for the situation I’m in. It’s a lot to think about, but I am so grateful for supportive and loyal friends.

Well said.

happy st. patty’s day 🙂

stay beautiful! xoxo

chels

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